Time to Lose Weight!?

So. I’ve gained weight.

I don’t own a scale, yet I weighed myself when I was home over Easter. I didn’t think the number would affect me, but I didn’t think the situation through either.

I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been.

Granted I’ve grown up on the edge of being underweight until I started strength training as a teenager (I just realized I’m not a teenager anymore. What. Does this mean I’m too old to watch Disney movies alone?).

I went (am going) through a severe depression and a severe injury. That has meant getting out of bed was tough. Getting dressed was exhausting. Just the thought of doing anything was completely overwhelming, so yes I didn’t workout.

That was the best way I could take of my health at the time.

Now, my energy level is increasing. I slowly started going for longer and longer walks. A couple of weeks ago I started going to the gym regularly, because I want to – now.

I don’t regret taking a break – because exercising through my depression would be as is easy as it is for you to climb a Kilimanjaro right now. And I bet that’s not happening! Although it must be hard to understand if you haven’t been in the same situation, hence the misconception that people with depression are lazy.

I said the fact that I had gained weight wouldn’t bother me if I was still able to function normally, to work out. And I was right. Over the past month my self worth and body confidence has skyrocketed – and I doubt my weight have changed much. I haven’t had a close look at my body.

So is it time to lose weight for me?

Yes, but not because I’m trying.

It’s just very likely to happen now that I’m so much more active and have energy to cook real meals. I don’t to go all restrictive or on stupid detoxes – I want to rediscover my healthy happy balance!

I don’t care about how I look. I don’t care about how much I weigh.

I care about how I feel, how my body feels – and I feel best when I workout, ‘overweight’ or not.

Thank you for reading and following ♥ 

Gif that says lots of love, Anne xx

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23 Comments

  • I weigh myself probably too frequently, more than once a week. And yet, every time I step on the scale, I quietly chant “your weight does not define you” before I look down at the number it produces. Sometimes it’s higher than the last time, and other times its lower. I kinda fluctuate in a 5lb range it seems. It’s fantastic you have more energy now and want to exercise! Let that motivation, rather than a number on a machine, propel you 🙂

  • I have gain weight these past months too and although I should be worried or feel sad about it, I feel happy. I started feeling more confident in my own body and I actually think that curves are incredibly sexy! I love that you have the biggest motivation and the right attitude to this! Wish you all the best and always remember that the only thing that matters is your happiness and health 🙂

    -Leta | The Nerdy Me

  • You’re NEVER too old to watch Disney films alone, I’m 27 and still love a Disney session.
    I never go by weight, I lost a dress size last year after joining the gym but I saw the difference in my measurements rather than the scales

    • That’s such good news 😀
      Just goes to show that the best victories are non scale victories, because the scale can’t show the full picture

  • you are never too old to watch disney movies alone! i ditched my scale about two years ago. there is just no need to see a number on a scale. working out and eating properly is what makes me feel my best!

  • Love your message…you should definitely strive for good health and being happy in your skin versus whatever a scale or label says. Keep inspiring, beautiful!

  • Very well said, what counts is the way you feel and how your body feels and not the actual number on the scale. Also yes, depression and working out don’t go well together. Depression makes getting up seem like a challenge, so working out feels like climbing the Kilimanjaro. xx

    113-things-to-say.blogspot.com

  • I’m glad you’re feeling better now, Anne! I’m in a similar position right now – I’ve been finishing my degree, and haven’t had time to work out, so I’m heavier than usual. This post has definitely come at the right time, and I agree with you that the most important thing is how your body feels xx

  • Good for you! Losing weight isn’t a bad thing, I feel like with the body positivity going around (which I absolutely support) that people feel like its bad to talk about wanting to lose weight now. Its about looking and feeling good and confident! Do what makes you feel good! 🙂

    • Exactly!That’s a really good point, I’m all in for body positivity too, but it doesn’t exclude weight loss. I just need my workouts to feel good 🙂

  • I agree, the best thing I ever done was eat more food, and use the extra energy to train hard in the gym, and increase the weights in my lifts. It mentally hard yes, but I do agree it’s worth it and its needed, not only physically but mentally. You’e done the right thing, and I would encourage anyone to come off a diet for a few months of the year, to reboost your metabolism and learn to love your body all of the time, not just when its ‘looking its best’ xxxxx

  • Anne, I understand exactly where you are with your depression as I went through the same decision process. Partly I think it comes down to how much weight was gained and if there’s been any effect on your normal daily activity. Exercise has been shown to have such a positive effect on the brain in overcoming depression that I knew I should do it. I almost never take any type of prescription medicine, unless it’s absolutely necessary, so any natural method was of great interest to me. Exercise, following Wim Hof’s breathing exercises, and switching to plant based dieting have pushed me through the vast majority of my depression.

    Something happened with my body that initiated my depression and I put on about 40 pounds. I’m still going through my depression and it’s something I fight every day, but it’s decreased significantly. I wrestled with just being comfortable with my new plus size or if I should work out? As you may know, when you are depressed, working out isn’t something you want to do. It was doing some of the simple things in life like tying my shoes or walking the dogs is where I saw some of the challenges of being overweight. I knew I’d be better over the long term taking it off. Plus, even through I could try to be happy with my new size, I wasn’t sure my depression would let me.

    What pushed me to start exercising by walking was something short of a miracle. During a routine yearly checkup, my cardiologist out of the blue shared a story with me that he just read that morning how in Europe they stopped prescribing anti-depressants and now write prescriptions for their patients to walk briskly for 45 minutes. Walking for that period had the same chemical effect on the brain as Xanax or any other depression medicine. I was surprised that he shared this with me because I hadn’t said a word about my newly acquired depression, but I was sure glad he told me when he did. When I got home that night I started doing my own research and confirmed what he told me. But I also came across something else that I believe has also had an amazing positive effect on me – the Wim Hof methods of breathing and cold showers. You can do your own research, but adding breathing exercises and starting the day with a jolt of adrenaline from the cold showers is absolutely invigorating. It helped jump start my metal focus and actually helped put me in a better mood.

    I’ve been eating better and working out for the last year. I’ve only lost 7 pounds due to being insulin resistant, but this is a long term life style change and I feel great every time I exercise. Some days, the depression wins and I don’t work out, but little by little the tide has turned and I have more good days with exercise than days where I don’t exercise.

    Anne, your smile is contagious and reflects the amazing beautiful person inside you. Thank you for sharing your struggles and know you aren’t alone. No matter what path you decide, I wish you peace and happiness.