“All bodies are good bodies”
It’s a statement that more and more people agree with as messages of body positivity and self-love are spread everywhere through
wireless signals that manipulate our brains while we sleep the internet.
Do you agree?
But at the same time, I don’t always think my body is a good body.
It’s not that I don’t agree with the rational argument that breaks down and analyzes the way diet culture and beauty standards have manipulated us to think only certain bodies that fit a very narrow ideal are good enough. From Health At Every Size (HAES) research I know body shaming isn’t really about health.
I know my body is a good body.
But I don’t always feel it.
Maybe you feel the same way?
That’s completely okay.
You know why?
Because while you on a rational level may be able to agree with the statement, it takes time to connect with it on an intuitve and emotional level. You’ve been conditioned to think a certain, body-negative way for years by society and maybe even people close to you. That’s part of the way you view the world, and new ideas rarely gets adopted quickly and without any form of resistance – especially if exposure to body positive messages is new for you.
These mental habits, cognitive schemes have been build up from a young age.
- Stretch marks = BAD
- Fat = BAD
- Skinny (doesn’t matter if it’s caused by an ED, cancer or other illness) = GOOD
It’s like reflexes for your mind. They’re automatic, and so welltrained they feel like a part of you.
And the first step to rewriting them is to just notice you have them without jugding yourself.
The goal isn’t necessarily to end up loving every single part of your body (it’s not really about having a goal, as your mind is never static and this is a process where there’s always room for growth).
You don’t have to go stretch marks = GOOD, you don’t have to call them tiger stripes or lightning bolts.*
Stretch marks = stretch marks
No judgement of any kind. For some feeling neutral about parts of their body is the step between hating and loving it. For others, neutral acceptance is what makes their life better. They stop caring about how their body look, and is grateful for the fact that it lets them hug friends, go bowling, or whatever it is that add value to their life.
You don’t need to love your body. The goal is not to spend all day in front of a mirror thinking about how good you look.* It’s about not letting thoughts about your body and feelings of worthlessness stop you from enjoying your life.
What I’m essentially trying to say is, it’s okay to not always love yourself and your body. Logically breaking down the arguments of diet culture is only a step in the right direction. You have to understand it on an intuitive and emotional level too. . It’s not a quick and easy process to unlearn thought patterns that are so ingrained in (and supported by) society. Struggling with this is not a sign you’re worthless, it would actually be a surprise if you found it easy. But it can be done. With time, you’ll fully support all bodies as good bodies.
And by the way, I think your body is a really good body <3
* You can totally do that if you want though